Thursday, 3 September 2009

Public Holidays

In the UK a new law is implemented to create new public holidays. The law dictates that one person will be randomly selected from the population at the beginning of each year - this person then travels to Downing street to - live, on television - spin a wheel to select an appointment type. Throughout the year, whenever this person attends an appointment of this type it is declared a public holiday.
This year the lottery selected you. As the wheel comes to a stop you experience sheer terror. You're in London, you have half a pack of cigarettes, it's winter and the entire population of the country knows where to find you - and that it'll be a public holiday whenever you're in hospital.

Cursing the idiot that added that option to the wheel, you consider your options.

What do you do?


  1. Expose one's genitals, live on TV, and get slammed in jail for indecent exposure. Thus making you safe and away from whatever you were supposed to do.

  2. Ah, clever catfish, and away from people that benefit from public holidays.

  3. Say "ill start as i mean to go on", get out a cig, light it up, smoke 1/2 of it and then burn the back of my hand with the other 1/2. The run out of the building saying "im of to hospital" but instead get the feck out of doge and head of to the highlands.

  4. I like your thinking Herr Doctor. I think I'd go for announcing my pending trip to hospital followed by punching the camera until it stops working. Then head to a nearby but ill-frequented hat/false beard shop. Failing one of those existing, just absolutely anything to change my appearance. Using my jumper as a hair scrunchy/hat for example. Then head to the highlands.